Just a Regular Savior

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from picturequotes.com

I do not like insects , roaches , snails  and earthworms. I do not know if it is plain fear , lack of love , disgust ,something else or all of them . I never wanted to know. The “not liking” part is so severe that I planned to keep this post picture -free.

If I see anyone posting something about them , I keep myself away from WP reader that day.

During growing up years ,other people found it difficult to understand . I was mostly a fearless girl ; I traveled across states, countries all by myself.

Why do you avoid them?Are you scared?Try to overcome it.” – They all suggested.

I also never hit any mosquito during camping , picnics . I said : ” I do not like killing it. I am a peace lover! “.

I  tried and successfully fell sick during “Lets look inside earthworms and cockroaches ” session in school.

Once I requested my dad to take transfer to other city because a tree outside our house was full of pre-butterfly caterpillars.

[ Till now,when it rains and I find long earth worms during walk , I feel sad : ” Man! What are they doing in a developed world?” . I avoid muddy sidewalks when it rains. I wear sneakers with heels when I go to hike, to avoid encounters with insects . ]

All these were part of the life. And life moved on perfectly because I was never alone. I always had my younger brother as the savior , to protect me from things I did not like!

Then, one fine day, I turned 18 and went to do Engineering. Suddenly , it was an adult world  with words like “responsibilities”, “independence”.. The engineering hostel was full of girls who looked different , thought different.

Some were extremely geeky and their only friends were either semiconductors or bugs [Literally!] . Some girls came to have just fun ,away from parents ; some found their soul mates on the first day itself ; some expressed that Y2K was just..okay..just another kind of  bug or roach from another country.   😉

In all these, I found 3 other girls ( S,P,M and together we called ourselves SPAM thereafter) as healthy neighbors [& BFFs later] .

On first night, we 4 girls  found out that – along with many other things the “not liking many creatures” part was common too. ” In a wonderful world we all like to dislike the same thing !” – I concluded out of happiness.

Then , first rainy season came and I panicked finding two earthworms coming slowly towards me. M , the most introvert and lean girl in the lot dragged me aside and saved me from a panic attack and researched a lot to find another route to college.

When everyone took the shorter route to save themselves in rain, we four girls sang our rain songs and took the longer path for the rest of four years.

During a trip to a national park , S hit all mosquitoes with her two hands and saved all 4 souls.

How did you survive your fear? “- I asked them ,one day.

They both mentioned that seeing other people so afraid made them kind of stronger! “Also united we stand divided we fall! When we all are together , nothing is scary, you know! ” 

It was a picture perfect engineering life after that ; we spoke in Java, C , C ++ ; we tried to measure wavelengths with our thoughts ; we planned to use artificial intelligence in real life ; we tried to search circuits and micro-processors in every big thing. Together  , we were winning all frightening things quite easily.

One fine day, we heard story of a flying cockroach in our hostel . It arrived with someone’s luggage during vacations.

Till then, I avoided reading about cockroaches on biology book [ because of their images on books] .  “That thing can fly too.” – I said ,while planning to Google “Does Cockroach bite?”

The next night was memorable one in our engineering history . M came to our door crying : “Co…ckr….oach ..on my study table. Help.”

We all went to M’s room. And there it was .. a big size cockroach resting on our new drawing assignment sheet. S whispered : ” Lets call security. If he cant handle…then , maybe polic..”

Before she could finish, I walked ahead .Suddenly I did not know what happened to me. I took a glass tumbler and slowly walked to the cockroach and covered it with the tumbler , partly. I kept the tumbler slightly tilted so that oxygen could enter.

You know right , I do not like killing things.”  😉

I was treated like a hero in the hostel for next many months. Slowly we found many teary-eyed, cockroach fearing souls asking for help . We were treated like saviors in our newly cockroach infected hostel. 

Each time we helped someone , we found the fear disappearing slowly.

Months passed .

I went back home that summer and shared the cockroach story with my brother.

Even I was very scared of them. I  never liked how those insects walk ; how ugly their eyes are!. I never liked snails and earthworms too.  But seeing you so afraid, I had no choice but to be strong . ” – He expressed easily , adding an honest smile.

_________________________________**___________________________________

It will be a decade old story pretty soon. But , it’s still fresh in my memory. I remember it whenever I find someone struggling with something; I try to drop in ; try to protect , knowing that I may not be the strongest person in the world.

I still avoid insects . But  , the fear does not exist anymore. 

 

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19 thoughts on “Just a Regular Savior

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  2. I enjoyed your story very much! I like it when people share their insecurities and fears. We become compatriots because we all have fears! I liked that you got brave for the first time with a cockroach, a much larger bug than most. I would have picked a little bug to try this, but in this story you are a hero and had to come to the others’ rescue. Not killing it was so sweet, too.

    1. Thank you so much for the readership and comment. 🙂 Yes, no one is perfect. Then why to hide insecurities & fear? Right ?:). My friends were just like me; afraid of all those tiny creatures. But they saved me from earthworms , mosquitoes. So, I had to woman up too and save them. :D..My younger brother who was just a photo copy of me had to give up fear to protect me too. So, if there is love we all are heroes and saviors in this world. No?

  3. When my son was about 5 or 6 I was in charge of taking him fishing. I had never touched an earthworm; I also avoided sidewalks after a rain… But I toughed it up and thought, I’m not going to be a scaredy-cat mom and pass that on to my son. So I took a deep breath and picked up that first earthworm and crammed it on a fishhook. He never knew how much bravery that took.
    I did hate killing them, and now I never do (on Purpose anyway.) I went on to be a gardener who Loves earthworms. Though I can certainly do without those nasty roaches… Great post!

    1. Wow..What a beautiful story! Does your son know it now? My mom loves gardening and she is one brave soul. So , I completely understood your words. Thank you so much for sharing this soul touching story with us .:)

  4. That’s a great story! The only time I’ve been able to overcome my fear of insects is when my children needed me to save them — except in the case of wolf spiders (in which case we all scream in panic and run away lol). Earthworms aren’t an issue for me, though touching them is a little icky, but centipedes and millipedes *shudder*. Cockroaches are just … ew. I consider myself blessed that I’ve never had to deal with cockroaches 😉

    1. I spent my childhood close to hospitals since dad worked there and got hospital provided accommodations . Cleanliness was the main goal there, hence no insects. But there were too many trees; and nightmarish centipedes, earthworms , caterpillars 😦 scary , pathetic life it used to be , sometimes. But thankfully the hero. My brother always saved until I became real adult. Ha ha. 🙂 I am not afraid anymore..but still, somehow I avoid all of them. There’s no love for them. Thank you sooo much for sharing your story too. 🙂 I have two new friends now 🙂

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