Unseen camaraderie

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“The fact that love comes with expectations annoys me .”my friend M said to me.

“No, it sets you free , it makes you winner , everywhere! “I said to her, with eyes filled with teen-age hopes.

Several years later, during another meeting, we discussed that again, along with desolation, cohesion, expectation, favors whatever love carries with its glory. It was that time when internet friendship started. People started opening up their lives to strangers, writing every single thought [ or answers to “What’s on your mind? “] on statuses. A few of our friends started using “relationship status”  section on social networking sites; suddenly the world was becoming more open about things that we used to keep within personal boundary.

“I don’t know from where they assemble trust in relationships these days  !” , M indicated like a skeptical twenty-something soul.

“I don’t know how people feel love , fellowship in a virtual world. ” I emphasized, while noticing so many friends chasing love wherever they could . 

I am always old fashioned about mixing life with technology; even though I played with microprocessors, semiconductors and did my daily readings of the technology journals on the internet. Friendship, love, to me, were always about reality; I have so many friends in real life that there is no void left to fill with virtual feelings.

Also on social networking sites, you can see only one dimension of a person, the dimension he/she wants to show. I have seen in my extreme close circle that many people act differently on social networking sites, write about feminism, liberal world while practicing something exactly opposite in real life, write about book readings while acknowledging lack of interest in that area in real life.  I have seen crazily unhappy people posting happy pictures on Facebook. Many people use social networking to build an identity that they do not have and then they keep sacrificing their truth to build a mountain of lies. Luckily, all of these people who I could observe are real people. Seeing their drastic behavioral changes I knew the boundary to draw, beyond that surely I was convinced what and who not to believe.

” Never forget ,human beings are multi-dimensional  ” – I kept reminding myself each time I saw any unreal virtual presence!

“I live a status-free life ” I replied whenever I was asked about my Facebook absence.

I am not much active on social networking sites , that’s one of the reasons that my blog readership could not cross 1000 milestones in this year. I am also not good at blog commenting, blog -hopping, though I read almost 500 WordPress posts every week. I use WordPress to write my opinions and stories  , see how words heal hearts , join other photographers to frame the world and share the world I see . I cared for every single detail , I created this place with love . I am glad the way it worked for almost a year.

Blogging is beautiful because it opens new directions of wisdom, experiences. It’s a space where creating narration using words is more important than building identity.  You can be anyone, but if you’re opinionated, you’re welcome with open hearts. You do not have to build window dressing everyday to show something that you are not; you do not have to judge your readers or writers who you read; it’s not social networking; it’s mostly about celebration of words and thoughts.

I started blogging when no one I knew was doing it. I stopped blogging in 2009 because I could not manage time properly. The comeback in this year was not easy. I was new to WordPress and out of territorial blogging-fellowship.

Last week , I checked the dashboard – the comments , followers ,interactions that started from March this year. It didn’t feel like I failed. I did not want to gain anything from blogging [ What do you gain from your hobby?- Peace , maybe!] But when I looked back, I saw love, so much love in reader’s comments, in their faith in my posts and photographs; I saw friendship in each encouraging word. I am pretty sure of the magic of love that remains the driving force behind every post I write. 

*****

After having a tough phase, last week I read a wonderful comment from the fellow blogger,  Itty ; it left me teary-eyed; I shared her words about my blog with my husband, close family and closest friends. That day I felt how virtual world blends with reality, how one feels friendship in a world that you cannot see, touch, hear or smell . I broke my week long silence that day and wrote  a post finally. 

*****

I know what and who I gained through blogging.

You .Your readership. And this unseen camaraderie .

Words can shuffle minds, exaggerate people, regenerate faith, change the way we perceive and create a wonderful world for us. You know what, after reading posts and comments, I know now what to search in next year: Happiness through words and wonders.

*****

 A few comments from the blog world that made my year brighter : ~

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In case you missed the point  I wanted to make, in case no one told you yet:  it’s good to articulate your inner and outer world through writing [ or blogging ]; it makes the world closer and makes you feel more loved! Also this is something I learned- sometimes it’s easier to understand ourselves by reading our own words ; never forget that the best friendship still is the one that we have with ourselves .

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34 thoughts on “Unseen camaraderie

  1. An honest, truthful and enjoyable post on friendship Archita dear. You know I love reading your post and somehow can relate to it. Love and hugs.

  2. Once again, you shared your truth beautifully. It really is wondrous and strange and fantastic how someone you can’t see, hear or touch can have such an impact on your day/week/year/life, either for the better or worse.
    Keep sharing your truths! 🙂

    1. Hi Erica , I have something to update you. I thought of writing to you about MBTI and how I finally found out who I am ! 😀 Thank you for that ! I didn’t know about it. One day ,I was checking Dr.Phil personality test and then found MBTI and while reading it , I remembered your wonderful post , so checked all links and Wiki! . 🙂

      It’s so fantastic , this blog friendship! On one weekend , my husband was out , helping someone to get home from hospital. I was outside ,waiting for him to come , we don’t have a second car. It was very cold and I had nothing to do , no place to go! So, I opened WP Reader on my phone and kept checking amazing posts of my blog -pals ! I spent 2 whole hours standing there ,reading and enjoying reading ! That’s the impact of words and WordPress fellowship on me ! 🙂

        1. INTP and guess what everyone tells me I am an extrovert! It’s just that I open up nicely in front of like-minded people; I took the test quite a few times and I’m convinced . 😀

          1. One of my closest friends is an INTP! 🙂 Also, I’ve known some very extroverted introverts; it’s really about how you get your energy, as opposed to how much you actually like being around people. 😉

            1. Really ? I would like to know more. It’s so interesting to read about others with similar characteristics . Even though I don’t mind spending days alone , I talk a lot when I meet people , specially friends and family . Finding the “I” was an eye-opener.Yes, you’re right . 😀

              1. It really is fascinating, especially when you throw enneagrams into the mix (it hones in on who you are, whereas your MBTI could be a rather broad description).
                Haha, I talk a lot when I’m happy or excited. 😀

                What I found really interesting was how I understood myself better, my motivations and the reasons for what I do, when I learned my MBTI. Have you noticed something like that as well?

                1. Honestly , it felt like someone has written my biography without telling me. Then as I read more I got answers to many questions I had about myself! One thing , like you said , how you get energy, that’s so valid here. So many things like that, like in the details, not following traditions , love for logic, mathematics , arts and words to independent thinking! I’m still searching for the motivation part though.Sad part is I am not living up to my potential.

                  Truly Erica , thanks to your post I knew more about MBTI. 🙂 I’m glad you wrote it. 🙂

                  1. I’m glad you read it and took the time to read it and look into it for yourself! I felt the same way when I read my description — I remember wondering who took the depths of my soul and put it online, ha!
                    I think MBTI is really good at explaining how you operate, like your love for logic and math, and so on. Motivation comes from a few different other things — the one I found that best explains it is the enneagram theory. If you’d like, I can send a few links your way about those, so you can figure out what it is that drives you. 🙂 If not, that’s totally fine too.
                    Keep reading, keep researching! You can never know too much about yourself, and the more you know, the more you can reach your full potential. 🙂 I know you, of all people, can do it.

                    1. Thank you so much . 🙂 I am going to remember your words here and keep searching and researching. 🙂 Can you please send those links to me ? I will also read about Enneagram theory . 🙂

  3. So beautifully written!
    You deserve every one of those beautiful things people have written about you. What I like best about your posts is the positivity and cheer it brings with it. 🙂

  4. As i mentioned before – words always fail me when i read your posts! ( especially if it’s this emotional and true) There will be so much i would love to tell , so many thoughts and feelings felt alike that i seem lost in the labyrinth.
    I confess to the act of almost commenting something and then i go read the post again and then i forget what i wanted to tell and then go read again , at this point am totally lost and just like your post. Of course some i cannot resist and do comment. Well that’s the effect of your posts on me – it makes me lost , makes me to think once more and consider life in a sense of pure beauty.
    Your greatest strength lies in the fact that you can express beautiful thoughts in a more beautiful way. It seems so simple that it makes readers think , how could i miss that? And leaves us with a big cute smile.
    Not forgetting the most beautiful of photographs.( they are too awesome to express in words 😛 i will consider to reply back to the photographs with photographs 😛 or precisely to the beauty of a moment captured through lens and heart with another moment )
    Thank you , Thank you for being a friend.

    Your virtual presence seems very real for me. For reading your posts and hearing your comments feels as if you are sitting next to me and talking , giggling , smiling and guiding invisibly.

    Lots of love,
    Nadig 🙂

    1. Hi Nadig , How do you think of such beautiful things while commenting ? Whenever I go to comment I always feel lost in my own thoughts and hit only the “like” button if I liked the post. 🙂

      Thank you very much for being there as a friend and a great writer. 🙂

      I try , try my best to convey complicated things ( like thoughts , feelings) in simple words , otherwise who will read them ? 😦
      In real life , I have seen many lost cases of online friendships and internet-show-offs and since I work for technology , for me, it’s difficult to run away from FB , Twitter , G+ , skype , all these products that make interactions with the world easier.:) But , having a balance is necessary ! I heard someone marking blogging as social networking ; I didn’t like it because on blogs , we focus on words ; everything else is secondary!

      I like the fact that we all bonded here because we love writing ; we love expressing our opinions , telling our stories . 🙂

      I am so glad too to find you and your blog here ; your fictions and poems are wonderful and I wish you all the best . 🙂 Thank you . 🙂

      P.S – In real life , I giggle and talk a lot ; sadly that’s visible in this virtual world too ! 😀

  5. Beautiful post, and beautiful idea putting in some of our comments to you, Archita. I’m glad I helped make your year, you’ve certainly helped make mine! 🙂 *hugs* CK

    1. C.K , I’m so glad to have you on this blogging journey ; seeing your beautiful world , showing you this side of California and expressing the inner worlds that somewhere connects – our words made this year so beautiful. 🙂 Thank you very much for being there and being you. 🙂 *Hugs*

  6. I love your blog. I don’t always take time to show appreciation; but that doesn’t mean I am not following and reading.

    In 2014, I am going to try to be better at commenting. Like you, I don’t really use social networking, except that my blog posts automatically post to Twitter, Facebook and Tumbler. I like your comment about living a status free life. I’ve been told that I must use Google or I will fail Hmm…

    Blogging friendship:. I am not looking for friends online (I have real friends), although I appreciate the people I meet and interact with online. I do consider some of them friends – in an online sort of way. It can’t compare to a real world friendship, because in the real world, it is harder to pretend to be something you are not. There are bloggers who are very genuine people online – not different from who they are in the world. Yes, people are multi-dimensional.

    Having said that…

    I don’t mind pseudonyms, because I understand a person wanting to protect their identity and remain anonymous. The pseudonym should be obvious or I want to be told the name is not real. I do not want anything else to be fake. (I once worked on a hotline – there are a lot of dishonest people who fake identities and stories. They make up stories. It was easier to identify fakes with a voice attached to the lies).

    Personal stuff: I sometimes find that I share things online now that I never would have two years ago. I try to never cross lines that my family and friends wouldn’t appreciate. I don’t think of my blog as a journal. I do participate in prompts, and that sometimes draws out personal stuff.

    This comment is too long…sorry. It is like me to go on and on in comments…I try to keep myself in check, but I fail.

    Great post 🙂

    1. Hi Robin , Thank you for writing here .

      Yes, like you , I will try to read more blogs and leave my traces on the comment box in 2014. 🙂 It’s good to give a genuine feedback after reading.

      Blogging is not social networking ( and Thank God for that!). I love reading and when I read a blog I focus on the content , not on the writer . Hence identity does not matter. Blogging is writing too ; so content , language , vocabulary , grammars , photographs , editing – they all make a good blog post.

      Pseudonyms are great ; so many great writers used it to express their inner beauty. Sometimes , writers’ pen names help them to hide from this judgmental world . It’s good way to keep the focus only on the written posts.
      I love opinionated writings ; I love reading a well-written thought ,a beautifully drawn imagery in a flash fiction , a word-celebrating poem . 🙂
      The fact that blogging is more like celebrating opinions , thoughts and words makes me happy in this world. 🙂

      I read your blog , loved many of your posts , but I miss commenting. I am so sorry for that ; I will work on that. 🙂

      Thank you once again.

  7. A tale amazingly told ! I know how it feels to be in a generation that continues creating identities everywhere , search for love in places . I am wishing you more success in blogging ! The way you write is always honest and straight-forward!

    1. Thank you , Arka. 🙂 Yes , a good human being on a virtual world – that’s one tagline I would never like to sport ! :D.. And we all know ,it’s a non-stop process to rock a “good human being” tagline in real world ! 😀

      Blog world is more about creative thinking and creations – that one thing I love ! People love you for what you write – that’s something great to feel !

  8. It’s difficult to shine if you are not a social network loving blogger. But , at the end , only words matter! Lovely post on blog friendship. 🙂

    1. Yes, Ree. It’s too difficult . My blog is present on three social networking sites . It’s a tedious job though!

      Yes , blog friendship is beautiful and not judgmental ! Thank you for commenting. 🙂

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